How Many Language Exchange Partners Do You Need?

When you start using language exchanges apps it can be hard to know exactly how many people you should be talking to.

I would suggest that you try and get about 3-5 really good partners, although you may find that more or even less than this is ideal for you. It really comes down to you and what you want from the exchanges, but I will cover all of this before. 

It Really Depends On You

There really is no right or wrong answer and the truth is that it really depends on you. Only you will know what the right amount is and it could be totally different from what I think.  

We all have different personalities, social skills, lives and free time. We are also all at different stages of our language learning and putting different amounts of effort in to it.

This really means that means that it is down to you to decide if you have enough language exchange partners or not.

You Will Know When You Have Enough Language Partners

It sounds kind of stupid, but you will you will quickly know if you have too many language partners or not.

Replying to everyone takes time and effort and if your inbox is too full you can quickly become overwhelmed and things become stressful. I’ve had situations where I feel like half the internet is trying to talk to me at once and my inbox is just going too crazy with messages.

I know this is a real problem for woman, I’ve seen screen shots of inboxes that have hundreds, sometimes thousands of unread messages. That is just not manageable and is also often why you don’t get a reply when you message someone. They are not ignoring you; they just can’t accept any new exchanges as their inbox is flooded.

All of this will of course depend on how quickly you reply and how long their messages are too, but you will quickly know if you are spending far too long on these apps, it just won’t feel healthy. Yes, it’s good to get a lot of practice, but you also need to live your life and you will know if the balance is off.

You really will quickly work out what is too much and you will feel that overwhelming feeling. As soon as you reach that, you’ve got too many exchanges and you should stop talking to new people and also start ending some conversations to get things down to a manageable level.

Language exchange should be fun and enjoyable; it shouldn’t be stressful and feel like a job.

(You can read more about – Frequently Asked Questions About – Language Exchange Partners)

How Often Will You Be Practicing Your Language?

A good starting point is to ask yourself how much practice you want to actually do and how often.

A lot of people want to speak daily, and I would encourage that. The more you use your language the better, but of course this is harder to maintain and if you are trying to talk to a lot of people daily, it can really take up a lot of your time.

Some people you message may take a few days to reply, or maybe this is what you want to do. These types of conversation are of course a lot slower, but you can probably manage more of them …although, maybe you are busy and having a low number of slow conversation is what suits you best.     

(You can read more about – What Are The Benefits Of Having A Language Exchange Partner?)

What Is Your Skill Level In The Language?

You also need to consider your own skill level. If you are just a beginner then there is not a lot you can really practice, which really means you are going to be speaking more in your native language.

This will of course benefit your partner …but do you really want to have 20 conversations that are all in your native language? This would be a waste of your time, and could be better spent actually studying your new language. 

You also need to consider your partners level, if they can’t really speak your language and spend too long speaking their native one, does this help you? If you are advanced in the language, then maybe it does, if you are both beginners, it can be difficult to communicate.

I would suggest that the better you are the language, the more exchange partners you can realistically handle. Communication will be a lot more natural and you can just sort of talk to them normally.

If you are a beginner and struggling to form basic sentences, then keeping the number of exchanges low will probably work out better for you, even if you are excited to talk to everyone.  

What Does The Rest Of Your Life Look Like?

I have sort of touched on this already, but really you need to look at your life and ask how much time you can actually dedicate to your language learning and of course your exchange time.

The more partners you have, the more time you will need to spend talking to them. You can quickly waste a whole day chatting away on a language app and while that is cool every now and again, or on a rainy Sunday, the reality is that we have lives outside of this.

You still need to do your daily stuff, like work and everything else, so really how much time can you give to your language partners?

If you have one or two partners, you can easily keep messaging them throughout the day, it’s no real issue, and you probably do that anyway with someone you know already.

This is where you really need to find the balance and work out what is too overwhelming. We all have different lives and responsibilities so it’s really down to you to decide what fits in best with how you live.  

It’s Better To Have A Small Number Of Dedicated Exchange Partners

I would honestly say it’s better to have a small number of language exchange partners. This does two things, it firstly allows you manage your time properly and you won’t be spending all your time talking to people, but more importantly it allows you to build some actual proper relationships.

You will have the time to actually get to know them and hopefully become real friends. 

I would say the sweet spot is about 3-5 language partners. This should keep you busy and engaged along with enough variety, while at the same time it shouldn’t be too stressful and overwhelming.

Having a small number like this means you are also not too reliant on one person for help, so you are not always annoying them and you can sort of spread your own energy out across of couple of people. This way every one should be happy enough.

(You can read more about – What Are The Best Apps For Language Exchanges?)

How Many Language Exchange Partners Do I Have?

I personally have 2 people I speak to daily, then another 2 or 3 I speak to occasionally maybe once a week or so. I would consider all of these people my friends now and I feel like it is less of a language exchange these days and more a friendship that just happens to involve language.

I also don’t speak to these people on language exchange sites any more, they have my phone number and we talk like normal friends, it’s just that they live elsewhere. Sadly I haven’t met all of them in real life yet, but I have met some and plan to meet the others soon.

I also not really using language apps at the moment. I am quite busy and any free time I do get is spent talking to the friends I have already made, rather than trying to chat to new people. I know if I tried to add some more I would end up getting overwhelmed and would start struggling to keep up with all the conversations.    

(You can read more about – Why Are There So Many Idiots On Language Exchanges?)

One Time Exchanges Are Boring

There are some people on exchange apps who just like to have one time chats, and while that can be fine, I just think you are missing out on a lot.

Most of the first conversations you have with someone are pretty similar, and to be honest, boring. I feel it takes a while for some people to open up and to get to know them, so it’s worth talking to them for a while.

However, I understand the fact that you want to come one and have a quick chat and practice some basics and leave, rather than try and make some friends, but I really feel making some stronger connections will actually benefit your language learning. You can really learn a lot more about the culture and language when you have taken the time to make actual friends with a native.

I also understand that not everyone you talk to is going to be someone you want to talk to again, there are some weirdoes out there, so I don’t blame you for not trying to keep those conversations going.

(You can read more about – What Do You Talk To A Language Partner About?)

Conclusion

Hopefully now you have a better understanding of how many language partners are going to be ideal for you.

Really you just need to start talking to people and you will quickly get a feel for what the right number is for you. The whole process should be enjoyable and not overwhelming so as long as you are feeling that, you probably have the right number of partners.    

(You can read more about – How Do You Start Talking To A Language Exchange Partner On An App?)